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Got pulled aside again. My son is 3 and a half and he pushes and grabs other kids, mostly when he wants a toy or when they're playing a game he wants to join. He's not malicious, he just doesn't know how to say "can I play?"
They've used the phrase "very physical" three times now and I can feel myself getting defensive. Is it normal? What can I do at home?
Very normal for a 3 year old boy who's big for his age (guessing?). Ours was the same. We role-played at home with toys. "Teddy wants to play. What does Teddy say?" Sounds daft but he actually used the words at nursery.
@Adebayo_F he is the biggest in his room, yes. He doesn't know his own strength.
Ask the nursery for specifics, what happened just before, what they did after, and ask them to tell you when he gets it RIGHT too. If all you hear is negatives you'll both feel worse.
Rough and tumble play at home can help, oddly. Wrestling with dad, pillow fights, with clear "stop means stop" rules. They learn their strength and how to read when someone's had enough.
Our nursery used a 'turn timer' for popular toys, sand timer, so the grabbing went down a lot.
Update: had a proper meeting with his key worker. They're going to give him the "can I play?" words, praise him when he uses them, and send me a note on good days too. Two good days notes already this week. Feeling a lot less defensive.
Good days notes are a brilliant idea. That should be standard for every nursery.
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