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My son is 6 weeks old. I really wanted to exclusively breastfeed. But my supply has never been great, he wasn't gaining weight and the health visitor suggested topping up with formula.
We're now doing about half and half. He's gaining well, he's happy, and I'm sleeping a bit more. Objectively it's working.
But I feel like I've failed. Every time I make a bottle I feel guilty. Some of my NCT friends are exclusively breastfeeding and I avoid talking about it with them.
How do I let go of this?
You haven't failed. You've fed your baby. He's gaining weight and he's happy. That's the whole job.
Combination fed both of mine. They're 4 and 7 now and I promise you nobody has ever asked how they were fed. The guilt does fade.
Fed is best is a cliche because it's true. Your baby still gets plenty of breast milk. It's not all or nothing.
I'll be honest, I felt guilty for months. It was only when I talked to a counsellor about it that I realised the guilt was more about the pressure I'd put on myself than anything my baby needed. If it's dragging you down, speak to your health visitor.
Thank you all. I think I needed to hear people say it out loud. I'm going to mention the guilt at the next health visitor appointment, and maybe actually tell my NCT friends instead of hiding it.
I'd bet at least one of those NCT friends is quietly combi-feeding too and also too embarrassed to say. Be the first one to mention it.
Seconding Hannah. When I mentioned topping up in our group chat, three other mums said "oh thank god, me too".
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